I find myself constantly asking the same question as I seek to understand why we’re failing to make the big steps necessary to move beyond the status quo.
Why is that some people have the ability to see what’s possible and can let go of destructive habits, yet others have to be dragged kicking and screaming into new ways of living and working?
Human behaviour fascinates and intrigues me and it took me on a journey of discovery as I’ve delved further in research for my book “Let Go Or Be Dragged” – A Book of Conscious Choices.
You see I have a theory. I believe that until we can all help each other to transition from jobs which are harmful to ourselves, each other and the planet, then it is going to be harder for us to move towards a collective sustainable future. If our perception is that our security and income can only be derived from working in these industries, then how can we collectively let go of our current ways of working?
Of course, it’s totally untrue that we can’t move away from working in industries which harm ourselves and our planet. The fact is there are a growing number of social enterprises, community business, not for profits, BCorps and a whole host of other ways companies are providing a much needed antidote to business as usual.
But unless we know these exist and unless we feel personally supported in this transition are we likely to make this change?
Why is it that we equate change with something negative? Why don’t we embrace it? Is it because it requires us to take a different kind of action? Is it all too much effort for us? Are we so entrenched in our habits that it overshadows what we believe is possible?
One of the key reasons why we can get stuck in our comfort zone is that we are fearful of loss.
Typically we fear loss twice as much as we relish success, according to Daniel Kahneman.
Loss of salary, the loss of our current job, loss of face with our friends; it all gets added up in our minds and even just thinking about those losses, can stop us in our tracks and prevent us from moving forward. As human beings we do all we can to seek out ways to avoid pain and enjoy pleasure, so is it any wonder that one of our biggest challenges is to override our fear of loss in order to change our current situation?
So as we start the process of letting go of what no longer serves us, it’s important that we acknowledge and observe the deep fear of loss which resides within all of us, because if unchecked it has the ability to sabotage us as we move forward to our next challenge in life.
So just how do you minimise the impact of fear of loss?
I would say the first steps are to become conscious of your thought processes and observe and reflect on how your thoughts either fuel or reduce the fear of loss you experience.
Every moment of every day, thoughts materialise in your mind; some may be fleeting and depart soon after they arrive, others take root. Why is it that certain thoughts take hold? Are you consciously aware that you are holding onto some thoughts, magnifying and embellishing them, while others you’re able to let go of more easily?
What storyline are you creating with your thoughts? What does this story tell you about what you’ve got hooked on?
“Let Go Or Be Dragged” A Book of Conscious Choices – Available here